Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Say Hello to Your Friends, Babysitters Club!

We need to talk about how good the BSC is. Abbi devoted a whole post to them today, and I feel it is my duty, as the BIGGEST BSC FAN EVER to continue in her tradition.

For those of you who managed to avoid the intermediate book series section at your local bookshop, the Babysitters Club is what the world would be like if 1) i created it 2) it morphed into some freaky pc-generated alternate universe 3) Conneticut towns were populated by 13-year-old girls with the maturity of senior citizens, with the life experience of a toddler. It's unrealistic and horribly-written. It was my life for a decade. They made a video series that was shown on the Disney Channel, and then they ruined life by making a feature film with horribly miscast fuckthings. (By 'they,' I mean The Man.)

<3. When I heard that #100 was called Kristy's Worst Idea, I FLIPPED out. One day, we will revisit this topic, but for the time being, I'd rather not alienate my fanbase. Haha, the idea that I have a fanbase is even more laughable than me caring about alienating them.

Next up: Why is Harriet Miers so fucking creepy looking?

She reminds me of...if Swoosie Kurtz was pure evil and had no judicial experience and wasn't on Sisters.

Clearly, they're twins.

"Sebastian! You little shit!"

If I was picking the Supreme Court nominee, I would pick a hardcore badass sex machine. It's a known fact that sex machines are incredibly intimidating, and they'd be able to push my agenda through the highest court in the land for at least half a century. Ergo, my choice for the Supreme Court:

JUSTICE JAMES FRANCO. swoon.

The Franco court could affirm all the amazing legislation that I've been mulling over for the last few years.
1. National Cigarette Ban.
No longer will innocent peope have to deal with second-hand smoke. It's totally ridiculous. If you want to smoke in public, go to France.

2. Declare Arnold Schwarzenneger, Mariska Hargitay and Winona Ryder national treasures.
I'm not sure how one goes about declaring people legal treasures, but they all clearly deserve it, and James Franco is practically a national treasure himself.

3. A new stadium for the Mets: E. E. Grimshaw Sports Arena.
I don't think the Supreme Court really has anything to do with such things, but since Congress would never confirm James Franco dot dot dot.
There would be a special section in the bleachers for puggies.

Mariska is winning an Emmy for this episode. Called it.

2 Comments:

At 6:04 AM, Blogger Trisha said...

OMG, I never did realize they looked so much alike! And you are right - Harriet Miers really REALLY needs to dig herself out of that grave and find some anti-aging cream - YIKES!

...next time do us a favor and leave the pictures for ugly people in 2pixel by 2pixel size =P

 
At 6:05 AM, Blogger Trisha said...

oh, and I forgot to mention -

DROOOOOOOOOOL

Oops. I think I shorted my keyboard.

 

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